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No Right Turns

 
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Posted by on January 27, 2012 in Humor

 

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Poor Newton …

 
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Posted by on November 22, 2011 in 2012 Election

 

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Newt was paid how much by Freddie Mac?

Republican Tea Party (GOTP) presidential candidate Newton Leroy Gingrich has been extremely critical of Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae, as well as the Democrats in Congress he claims played a key role in the collapse of the housing market, but what he hasn’t said is that he – apparently as a lobbyist – made between $1.6 million and $1.8 million in consulting fees from the mortgage company, a figure substantially larger than the $300,000 payment he was asked about during a recent Republican presidential debate.

Freddie Mac officials have also reportedly told Bloomberg that Gingrich was asked to build bridges with Capitol Hill Republicans and help sell the mortgage company’s public-private structure to conservatives, aka lobbying.

Of course Newton is denying the charges, “I do no lobbying of any kind, and I offered strategic advice and that’s all I do,” Gingrich said. “I don’t go to the Hill. I don’t lobby in any way. I haven’t for the years I’ve left the speakership, period.”

“I was quite happy to talk about the GSEs, which was the question,” Newton continued. “But once you got into a cycle where people were literally giving mortgages to people with no credit at all, you don’t have to be much of a historian to know that’s not sustainable.”

And not being much of a historian is a good thing since Newton isn’t much of a historian; case in point being during the 9 Nov 11, he claimed he warned Freddie Mac about its lending practices: “I offered advice. My advice as an historian when they walked in and said we are now making loans to people that have no credit history and have no record of paying back anything but that’s what the government wants us to do. I said at the time, this is a bubble. This is insane. This is impossible.”

But Newton’s version of “history” doesn’t match Freddie Mac’s, at least one source reportedly told Bloomberg Gingrich gave positive feedback on Freddie Mac’s plans to publicly pledge to issue subordinated debt, manage liquidity, undergo capital stress tests and expand various types of risk disclosures. Gingrich also said these moves would enable Freddie Mac to demonstrate benefits to the taxpayer, the source claimed.

Newton claims he offered the company “advice on precisely what they didn’t do;” once again however, the history is fairly muddied and no one at Freddie Mac remembers Gingrich raising the issue of the housing bubble or of being critical of Freddie Mac’s business model.

Once again Newton’s been caught with his hand in the cookie jar; first, as Speaker, he persecuted then President Clinton for indiscretions in the White House, all the while having his own sexual liaisons; second, now, as a presidential wannabe, he’s critical of Freddie Mac while having received more than a million dollars in “consulting” fees from the company? Newton is nothing more than the poster boy for today’s hypocritical conservative movement, whose mantra is “Do as I say, not as I do,” secondary only to its motto, “We belief in the Golden Rule; he who has the gold makes the rules.”

 
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Posted by on November 16, 2011 in 2012 Election

 

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GOTP presidential hopefuls hammer health care, have nothing new to offer? Nope not one new idea, just more of the same old tripe they’re always scooping out …

And so, it’s 20 some odd months until Election Day 2012 and a very small group of potentially high-profile Grand Old Tea Party (or the group formerly known as Republican) candidates show up like the early spring honey bee hoping to impress the equally small hundred or so conservative activists Saturday in Des Moines, Iowa that most Americans (that would be GOTP, Independent and the very small smattering of Democratic voters) agree with their particularly odd variation of “values”, and opposition to all and everything President Obama represents, but mostly his socialistic health care overhaul; and that all of this could somehow magically help the GOTP make historic gains in 2012.

One of the most incredible long shots in political history, except for possibly with this year’s gathering of right-wing odd balls and fruit cakes is Michigan Congresswoman Michele Bachmann, who not surprisingly is a huge a tea party favorite, and who – also not surprisingly – got the noisiest reception when she told the “huge” hundred plus crowd gathered that voters are ready to overturn the federal health care law and oust President Barack Obama during next year’s election.

“The ultimate arrogance, in my opinion, is Obama-care,” Bachman said. “That’s why I am so absolutely confident in 2012. Americans have made the decision that we’re going to take our country back.”

Ah yes, the perennial GOTP favorite line, “we’re going to take our country back.” But to where do you want to take it, and for whom Congresswoman? Are we going back to 2008? Back to those happy carefree days of Bush/Cheney when habeas corpus was suspended on a whim if your name had Mohamed in it, or before our military was free from Gays and Lesbos? Or back to the pre-Camelot days before all those pesky Black people dared to eat at the same lunch counter?

Of course the Newt was there, and the deep south’s Haley Barbour and even former Godfather’s Pizza CEO Herman Cain spoke to add a splash color to the Midwest white bread event as the token conservative African-American, since Justice Clarence Thomas was unable to attend due not being sure how to bill the gathering and still at least try to appear impartial on the bench.

But why Iowa you ask? Is it because it’s a field of dreams, and hopefully Newt, Barbour and company will all walk into the corn and finally fade away? Or is it simply because event organizer, Iowa Congressman Steve King, believes that his home state, the state where the nation’s first presidential caucus will take place, is the proper venue to help conservatives shape the debate as members of the GOTP begin looking for a candidate to run against Obama.

“We need to take this nation to the next level of its destiny,” King told the crowd. “You can shape that destiny.”

Of course with Bachman, Newt and Barbour that “next level of its destiny” can only mean backwards or farther off the cliff of economic collapse started during the last administration.

While Iowa is the traditional launch pad for the presidential nominating season, when one sees the sharply conservative rhetoric from Saturday’s little rally, allegedly reflecting an Iowa GOTP that’s drifted not just to the right, but to the far right, coupled with some polling data from last year showing more than 60 percent of GOTP caucus-goers there are identifying themselves as not only Christians but evangelicals, you have the makings of a gold old fashioned revival meeting, the type where Mormons – such as Mitt Romney – need not apply; of course it’s also then going to be an evangelical crowd that’s going to have a hard time getting its arms around a two time adulterer, or a deep south nominee, which leaves the nomination wide open for Huckleberry, Bachman and Palin. How wonderful.

Interestingly enough Newt insisted that most Americans agree with his conservative values, with the Newtster actually saying the 2012 election would provide a chance to end the “domination of the left and move this country back to the center-right.”

That would be the center right where family values stands for cheating on not just one but two spouses, marrying each mistress in turn and then claiming you couldn’t control your hormones because of your deep seated love of country?

Haley said the GOTP can win next year if their candidates stay focused on key issues — health care and balancing the federal budget — without getting distracted by arguments about personality. Of course by balancing the budget he means zeroing out any progressive programs, while continuing to cut taxes to the top 2% of the nation’s population and allowing defense spending to maintain its unabashed feeding frenzy.

“What is important to us is to have a new president,” Barbour said. “This election needs to be about policy.”

That’s right. It’s all about the policy of taking our country back to a time when uppity folks like foreign born blacks knew their place, isn’t that right Governor? It’s about an America where homos and lesbians weren’t allowed in polite society, and it’s about the America where the term foreign policy meant telling our allies to shut up, sit down and do what we told them to do.

During the “event”, the speakers all focused on criticizing President Obama and the Democratic Party, and the Newter even took the time to say how he “helped balance a budget for four straight years” while House speaker. That of course was due more largely to the efforts to his fellow philanderer President Clinton, than for anything he himself managed to do, between his own affairs while impeaching the President for his infidelity.

But of course, Newty also took the opportunity to attack – yet again – President Obama’s handling of the air strikes in Libya. He ridiculed Obama for consulting the Arab League and the United Nations, but not Congress, before getting involved. The Newt said he wouldn’t have approved the air strikes, even though he pushed for air strikes and a no-fly zone just a week or two before the President implemented that very policy, but said Newt, “once you get involved, you put on the pressure and you win quickly.” As compared to becoming bogged down in not one but two wars with absolutely any exit policy, clear cut goals or objectives.

Cain, who decided to be the one speaker not talking about the federal health care law, said the conservative movement is gaining strength and will help the GOTP “take back the government”.

He does understand that the GOTP’s version of “taking back” the government would mean he’d be serving them the pizza, and driving Miss Daisy around town, doesn’t he? Taking the country back doesn’t mean equality for Blacks, Hispanics, Gays or Lesbians. It’s taking the country back to the happier times of Herbert Hoover before Labor Unions and desegregated class rooms.

Seeming to be oblivious to all of this, and believing the fact that since he’s a wealthy black man meant he shared in the GOTP dream, he said the U.S. has “an entitlement spending crisis” that must be reformed in order to solve the nation’s financial woes. Being the GOTP code for throwing the poor and the elderly out on the street where they belong. Cutting social security benefits to the disabled, cutting WIC and women’s pre-natal and health care, slashing college loan programs to the poor and zeroing public broadcasting, and arts programs.

“We don’t like the radical socialist agenda that is being shoved down our throats,” he said.

And what he wanted to say is we don’t like the idea that the poor can have free health care, and have their standard of living increased, and that we have a minimum wage and child labor laws and the like, and that he could’ve made much higher profits if only he could’ve paid lower salaries or could’ve had five and six your olds slaving away in his pizza kitchens.

Meanwhile, Bach on the farm, the Congresswoman from Michigan steered things back onto the effort to repeal the health care reform law and said that American’s bad feelings for the law had created a strong tide of support for the GOTP positioning itself for next year’s election.

“It’s never gone below a majority of Americans who want to see Obama-care repealed,” Bachmann said. “This is, I believe, the greatest power grab that I have ever seen.”

Really, “it’s never gone below a majority of Americans who want to see Obama-care repealed”? While that might be true of any Rasmussen poll, in the world outside of the FOC PAC bubble the clear majority doesn’t want it repealed, and is happy with the law. And are you really serious when you claim this is the greatest power grab you’ve ever seen Congresswoman? So, one can only assume you either haven’t paid any attention to the whole political coup thing in Wisconsin? Or, you wholeheartedly agree with it?

Bachman exhorted the hundred or so listeners that the stakes in next year’s election are enormous, and that “what we are going to determine together, here in Iowa, is quite frankly whether we will pass the American Dream on to the next generation.”

Of course that’s the American dream of white, Anglo-Saxon, Christian evangelicals. Not the one that includes people of color – except to clean the house, repair the roof, pick the vegetables and maybe collect your garbage. It’s also not the American Dream of any of those darned Muslims and their Mohamed; it’s not the American Dream of religious freedom, unless you strictly uphold to the idea that America is a Christian nation; of course it’s a Christian nation that is largely denying the Christ, and his teachings regarding caring for the poor and the sick among us, and of brotherly love etc. It’s the Evangelical Christian American Dream of the Old Testament where Gays are stoned to death, and only white people get to be President. It’s the American Dream of preemptive warfare and unending tax cuts and never having to pay the bill for the Wild West diplomacy.

 

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GOTP hopefuls complain but no plans on Libya

Isn’t it amazing how the Bungling Brothers Three Ring Circus, also known as the GOTP hopeful candidates for the 2012 nomination are all being very quick to criticize the President’s handling of the U.N. mandated no-fly zone in Libya, but not one of them has come forward with how they would have handled it. Well, except for Newt, who was for a no-fly zone before he was opposed to one?

And speaking of the Newt, he’s our first performer  in the center ring flip flopping across the ring, “You have a spectator in chief, not a commander in chief,” the Newt grumbled, one assumes meaning he’s for the no fly zone now? Or does he want boots on the ground this week?

At first Newtee very vocally demanded a no-fly zone after the President Obama said Gadhafi needed to be ousted, but then when the President began moving forward and the Newtster saw it was being billed as “humanitarian mission” he quickly decided he wanted nothing to do with that. He also first said in one interview that air strikes would oust Gadhafi and then said jets would not be able to end his rule now that fighting had gone into the cities. Newt’s effectively become the circus’ Push Me Pull You candidate.

Next to perform is Haley Barbour the Governor of Mississippi who is calling the President’s response to the situation “dithering.”

Barbour told a Jackson, Miss., radio station: “we haven’t provided leadership in this administration. In fact, the Obama administration’s position has been to say, ‘You know, we’re just one of the boys. We’re not going to try to be the leader.'”

Yeah, too bad Haley conveniently ignored the fact United States forces led the air strikes over Libya under the auspices of a United Nations resolution authorizing force in the interest of preventing a humanitarian crisis. He offered no opinion on an appropriate U.S. response, just the fact that this response lacked any leadership, as compared to what? The good old days of Sheriff Bush and his posse telling Bin Laden he could run that he couldn’t hide? Newsflash! He’s still out there!

Our juggling act will be performed by the great health care reformist himself, the former Massachusetts Governor Mitt Romney who said the President has been “tentative, indecisive, timid and nuanced.”

Romney says he supports the mission in Libya. He’s just not a fan of the President who started it or his approach to international affairs. So, he’s saying it’s the right mission, just the wrong guy going to get the credit? He didn’t detail what the Libya policy would be under a Romney administration.

“Thus far, the president has been unable to construct a foreign policy, any foreign policy,” Romney told Hugh Hewitt’s radio show. “I think it’s fair to ask, you know, what is it that explains the absence of any discernible foreign policy from the president of the United States?”

You’re kidding right Mitt? No foreign policy from President Obama?

How about the fact the President has restored strained alliances and friendships around the world? President Obama’s call for partnership, respect for international rules on prisoners, and acceptance of the responsibilities associated with climate change, transformed America from the isolated and lonely superpower of Bush/Cheney often seen as a threat to international order back into a leader in Europe, Asia and the Middle East. The President is pulling our troops out of the nightmare of Iraq, and plans to do the same for our troops in Afghanistan.

No circus would be complete with some Paws, and former Minnesota Governor Tim Pawlenty said President Obama erred by not forcing a no-fly zone more quickly.

“The rebels at that time were on the verge of overthrowing Gadhafi. They had the momentum. They were in position to do it,” Pawlenty told FOX PAC. He said President Obama left the rebels without backup and Gadhafi ready to squelch them. But he didn’t say what he would do differently now. So, if we had President Pawlenty he would have gone it alone to support the rebel cause? Pawlenty isn’t entirely wrong in his assessment. Things could’ve and should’ve moved much quicker. But then what?

And our last performer today is the 2008 GOTP vice presidential nominee and former Alaska governor, Palin the Jungle Girl, who whined, “We’ve received different messages from our president and from his advisers as to what it is that we are doing there and what the mission is.”

And how would Palin have handled the situation, if – “gulp” – we had President Palin? She offered her usual snarky complaints with no plan attached, “certainly there would have been more decisiveness.” So, she would have decisively done what? At some point she will probably release a You tube video decrying how she’s the real victim of the conflict in Libya.

Aside from the whining and complaints, notice anything missing ? Not one of these so-called candidates had anything of substance to say. Not one has offered anything of depth. Not one has said how things would be different if they were the King of the Forest. Well, “there would have been more decisiveness”. No plans, nothing.

The most amusing part of these latest attacks from the GOTP misfits is that they’re coming while U.S. forces are enforcing the no-fly zone over Libya to protect rebels trying to oust Libyan leader Moammar Gadhafi – just as the GOTP demanded. Remember that, just as the GOTP demanded.

These “candidates” are all sort of saying President Obama is too slow and too reliant on international approval from the Arab League, the United Nations and NATO. Yes sports fans, what we really need is a President who tells the rest of the world to go jump in a lake while we preemptively invade whomever we darn well please, because that worked so well for the United States during the Bush/Cheney years.

 
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Posted by on March 26, 2011 in 2012 Election

 

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The Newt rides the seesaw on Libya no-fly zone

Newt Gingrich spent a lot of badly needed brain cells last week criticizing President Barack Obama for not imposing a no-fly zone over Libya. Now the former House Speaker is lashing out at the White House’s intervention, calling it as “badly run as any foreign operation in our lifetime.”

Really Newt, as “badly run as any foreign operation in our lifetime”? You can’t really be serious? I think Operation Iraqi Freedom will very probably go down as, if not the very worse, than one of the very worse foreign operations of not only our lifetime, but of all time. Second probably only to Xerxes’ decision to invade Greece in what we like to call “Operation Persian Folly”.

“The standard he has fallen back to, of humanitarian intervention, could apply to Sudan, to North Korea, to Zimbabwe to Syria this week to Yemen, to Bahrain,” the Newtered one said on the “Today” show Wednesday morning. “This isn’t a serious standard. This is a public relations conversation.”

As compared to, oh I don’t know? We’re invading Iraq because Saddam is a really, really bad guy, and he dresses funny, and therefore we’re going to take him out? Gee Newt, that thinking could have applied to any number of “bad guys” throughout the globe, like Kim Il-sung, Hu Jintao, Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity or maybe even Glenn Beck. Talk about not having a serious standard on foreign policy decisions and U.S. military intervention. But wait, perhaps your standard would be more along the lines of such great successes as selling arms to the Contras? Or sending Marines into Lebanon? Or invading Somalia?

“I would not have intervened. I think there were a lot of other ways to affect Qaddafi. I think there are a lot of other allies in the region we could have worked with,” the Newtster added. “I would not have used American and European forces.”

Yeah, if Newt were President he’d have sent in the guys on camels from Egypt; or maybe he’d tell the rebels if they really loved their country they should grab a congressional aide and have a good old fashioned affair.

Newt seems just a tad bit conflicted these days, just last week, he said he would implement a no-fly zone “this evening.”

“We don’t need to have the United Nations,” he told FOX PAC. “All we have to say is that we think that slaughtering your own citizens is unacceptable and that we’re intervening.”

YEAH! YOU GO NEWT! YOU SHOW EM’ WHO’S BOSS! THAT’S TELLING EM’ BOY!

OK, I’m sorry Mr. Former – I had to resign because I didn’t have any morals and lost my party’s congressional majority – Speaker, with all due respect, did you fall out of the stupid tree and hit every branch on the way to the ground? Were you dropped – repeatedly – as a child? Yeah, your idea of a foreign policy intervention has no ramifications whatsoever. Did you even bother call President Bush before you stole his plan for the Middle East, or did you come up with this all on your own? This is another really good example, in an ever growing list of examples, as to why you’re in no way remotely qualified to be President. Now, really, just back away from the presidency and you won’t get hurt; don’t make me roll up a newspaper and hit you on the nose with it; just back away like a good boy.

 

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Gingrich Says it was Love of Country Which Led to His Affair?

GOTP presidential hopeful Newt Gingrich has officially lost his mind. He has said it was his passion for his country that contributed to his marital infidelity.

Excuse me? OK, first, the word “love” should never be used in the same sentence with “marital infidelity,” and second, it wasn’t so-called love of country it was lust for your staffer. Let’s be clear about this Newt. And third, is this supposed to make anyone feel comfortable with you running for the presidency? How many staffers will need to be hired if you win to help you show how much you “love” your country?

“What I can tell you is that when I did things that were wrong, I wasn’t trapped in situation ethics, I was doing things that were wrong, and yet, I was doing them,” he said.

You know Newt, this is the interview that just keeps giving isn’t it?

“Forget about all this political stuff. As a person, I’ve had the opportunity to have a wonderful life, to find myself now, truly enjoying the depths of my life in ways that I never dreamed it was possible to have a life that was that nice,” Newt said.

Wow, it’s very gratifying for all of us to know that you’re having such a wonderful life Newt, thanks for sharing that with us. How’s that second wife doing, the one you divorced after cheating with mistress/wife #3? And how’s your first wife? You remember her Mr. Family Values? The one you were stabbing in the back during your affair with wife/mistress #2 while she was undergoing chemotherapy?

Just how stupid do you think Republicans are Newt? Not to mention the rest of us? You really think this kind of confession helps your chances of running for the White House? You can’t even admit it was your fault can you? Nope it wasn’t Newt’s fault everybody; it was his “love” of America that drove him into multiple woman’s bed

You can’t make this stuff up. This is the rank hypocrisy of the GOTP. You led the impeachment of President Clinton for having an affair, and for lying about it, while you were having an affair, lying about it, and then you blame it on your “love” of country? Please, really, just go away. You’re embarrassing yourself; you’re embarrassing your family; you’re embarrassing your party. But, you know what? At least you’re giving the late night comedy writers plenty of material.

 

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