Tag Archives: Herman Cain


Just a thought…

2016 vs 2012 vs 2008

1 Comment

Posted by on January 7, 2016 in 2016 Election


Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

No right turns

Leave a comment

Posted by on December 13, 2011 in Humor


Tags: , ,

And then there were seven – Cain says good-bye

The Associated Press (AP) is reporting Republican Tea Party (GOTP) wannabe Herman Cain’s suspending his bid for the Republican presidential nomination to avoid continued news coverage of allegations of sexual misconduct that’s hurtful to his family.

“I am suspending my presidential campaign because of the continued distractions and the continued hurt caused on me and my family,” Cain told several hundred supporters gathered at what was to have been the opening of his national campaign headquarters.

So, Cain’s dropping out because of the evil media’s coverage of the sexual allegations, but not because of his own misconduct?

Cain’s announcement came five days after an Atlanta-area woman claimed she and Cain had an affair for more than a decade, a claim which followed several allegations of sexual harassment against him.

“But because of these false and unproved accusations, it has paid and had a tremendous painful price on my family,” Cain said, with his wife, Gloria, standing behind him on the stage.

“Now here’s why it hurts – because my wife, my family and I, we know that those false and unproved allegations are not true; so one of the first declarations that I want to make to you today is that I am at peace with my God. I am at peace with my wife. And she is at peace with me.

And with that Herman “Pizza Man” Cain becomes a footnote to the 2012 GOTP Presidential primary season; good-bye Herman you’ve provided us all with hours of rib tickling entertainment.

Leave a comment

Posted by on December 3, 2011 in 2012 Election


Tags: , , , , ,

The campaign’s all but over?

The Associated Press (AP) is reporting that former Republican Tea Party (GOTP) frontrunner Herman “Pizza Man” Cain is still campaigning for president; but anyone with an ounce of sense – which rules out both Cain and Michele Bachmann – knows his White House bid is all but over.

“His chance at winning the presidency are effectively zero,” said Dave Welch, a Republican Tea Party strategist who worked on both of John McCain’s presidential bids.

That’s an interesting proposition Mr. Welch, except Cain’s chances of winning the White House have always been effectively zero.

One of the “no duh” moments in this so-called campaign came today when the Pizza Man told the New Hampshire Union Leader that his wife, Gloria, didn’t know he was providing the 46-year-old Atlanta-area businesswoman with money for “month-to-month bills and expenses.”

And, guess what? Cain also said, his wife didn’t know of what he called a “friendship” with White until she said publicly that she had a casual 13-year affair with Cain that ended about eight months ago.

“I’m still backing him, but I definitely think it’s a bigger and bigger mountain to climb,” Florida state Rep. Carlos Trujillo said after White emerged. “It’s going to be difficult to make up that ground in so short an amount of time.”

Difficult?! Difficult?! Were dropped as a child; repeatedly?!

First, if he’d ever been a real candidate – meaning he had a snow ball’s chance of winning – it’d be impossible after the sexual harassment charges and a woman saying she’d had a 13 year affair with him’ second, since he was never a serious candidate, there was never a chance, even less than a snow ball’s chance. Seriously, what’s fetching wrong with you people?!

Cain’s said he’s reassessing and re-evaluating whether to remain in the race and will only make that decision after speaking face-to-face with his wife of 42 years.

He should’ve said after he speaking to his wives’ attorney; good luck with that conversation.

“Turn out the lights, there’s never been a party – it seems that all good things must end” – like his so-called campaign and his so-called marriage.

Leave a comment

Posted by on December 1, 2011 in 2012 Election


Tags: , , , , ,

Harassment claims have affected support, ya think?

The Associated Press (AP) is reporting Republican Tea Party (GOTP) presidential has been playah Herman “Pizza Man” Cain’s acknowledging his slip from the top of the Crazy Eights was due to his lack of addressing accusations of sexual harassment and continued abject confusion about his so-called policies.

The former pizza magnet and “playah” insists his campaign’s sound and supporters remain on board what he calls the “Cain train;” and that sounds reminiscent of what a White Star Line ticket agent might have said about the RMS Titanic still sailing into port even as she was floundering at sea.

Cain has denied the accusations and says “nothing has gone wrong” in terms of the campaign’s mechanics. But he tells CNN’s “State of the Union” that some people “are heavily influenced by perception more so than reality.”

Well look who just caught up; perception is reality Pizza Man, especially in politics, and the fact you and your staff didn’t know this shows once more how unprepared you were to be running.

The Pizza Man never had a chance of winning the nomination, and the fact the party faithful are now flocking to Newton “Stay Puffed” Gingrich shows that. It’s way past time for most of the Crazy Eight’s to pack it in.

Leave a comment

Posted by on November 28, 2011 in 2012 Election


Tags: , , , ,


Dear right-wing uber-conservative Christian fanatics,

Article VI of the United States Constitution reads, “The Senators and Representatives before mentioned, and the Members of the several State Legislatures, and all executive and judicial Officers, both of the United States and of the several States, shall be bound by Oath or Affirmation, to support this Constitution; but no religious Test shall ever be required as a Qualification to any Office or public Trust under the United States.”

“NO RELIGIOUS TEST SHALL EVER BE REQUIRED”! That means there’s supposed to be a separation from religious extremists like yourselves and the Presidency.

But, just in case Article VI isn’t clear enough, how about Article 2, Section 1?

“Before he enter on the Execution of his Office, he shall take the following Oath or Affirmation:–‘I do solemnly swear (or affirm) that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my Ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States.'”

NOTE, there is no phrase, “So help me God” on the end of the oath of office; so stop pushing for there to be some twisted form of your uber-conservative Evangelical Christianity as the litmus test of who should or should not be elected President! You have two choices here, you either support the Constitution as the revered Founding Fathers wrote it, or you don’t; clearly there was to be a separation.

Furthermore, in spite of Michele “Krazy” Bachmann’s insistence that Washington uttered the phrase “So help me God” following his swearing in, the earliest known source indicating Washington added “So help me God” to his acceptance, not to the oath, is attributed to Washington Irving, who was six at the time of the inauguration, and first appears 65 years after the event; the only contemporary account that repeats the oath in full, a report from the French consul, Comte de Moustier, states only the constitutional oath, without reference to Washington’s adding “So Help Me God” to his acceptance. But if – and it’s a big IF – George Washington added the words that doesn’t make it somehow Constitutional by executive fiat.

While we’re running down this rabbit hole, did you know President Theodore Roosevelt didn’t use a Bible when taking the oath in 1901? Or that John Quincy Adams swore on a book of law? And that Lyndon B. Johnson was sworn in on a Roman Catholic missal on Air Force One?

And furthermore, we’ve not had a single Evangelical Christian serve as President, and if Bachmann, Perry, Santorum and Cain are examples of what that would mean, then thank God for that, and it’ll probably be a long time before we do.


Posted by on November 20, 2011 in 2012 Election


Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Cain would ‘overturn the Supreme Court’?

Republican Tea Party (GOTP) presidential has been Herman “Pizza Man” Cain declared Saturday he’d “overturn” the Supreme Court if they legalized same sex marriage.

During a debate at the First Federated Church in Des Moines, Iowa, National Organization for Marriage (NOM) president Brian Brown asked the Republican candidates what they’d do if the Supreme Court ruled that the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) — a law banning federal marriage equality — was unconstitutional.

“If the Perry case or a DOMA case gets to the Supreme Court and the Supreme Court were to overturn DOMA or to find a — quote — unquote — constitutional — a U.S. Constitutional right to same sex marriage, if you were president, what would you do?” Brown asked.

“I would lead the charge to overturn the Supreme Court if they overturned DOMA,” Cain insisted. “Whether that was new legislation coming out of the Congress like Rep. [Michele] Bachmann said. The United States Congress is supposed to pass laws so if they did overturn DOMA, that charge, I would lead to reverse that.”

Once more the Pizza Man demonstrates his inability to grasp how things work within the confines of our Constitutional Republic; the President has no authority to “overturn” the Supreme Court. He can appoint new Justices to fill vacancies, but that’s as far as it goes. The President can’t “fire” the Supreme Court. Cain was posturing for the uber-conservative Evangelicals, and his statement simply showed his ignorance, not his competence.

Leave a comment

Posted by on November 20, 2011 in 2012 Election


Tags: , , , , ,

Herman Cain asks for help speaking ‘Cuban’?

Republican Tea Party (GOTP) presidential hopeful Herman “Pizza Man” Cain has probably not helped his standing amongst Hispanics in Florida; while campaigning in Miami, he asked people at the famous Versailles Restaurant what the Cuban word is for “delicious.”

While visiting the cafe, Cain sampled strong Cuban coffee and a croqueta, a deep-fried delicacy filled with ham; asked how he liked his snack, Cain asked, “How do you say ‘delicious’ in Cuban?”

For the record Pizza Man, Cubans speak Spanish.

Cain clearly had too many things whirling around in his head; it’s just one more notch in his podium demonstrating how he’s not ready for the primetime, and won’t be elected President.

Leave a comment

Posted by on November 17, 2011 in 2012 Election


Tags: , , , , , , ,

God told him to run?

I'm sorry about all that sex stuff Lord, oh wait, what? You want me to run for President? Oh, never mind then about that other stuff, OK?

According to the Associated Press (AP) Republican Tea Party (GOTP) presidential hopeful Herman “Pizza Man” Cain said God told him to run for president, comparing himself to Moses; problem is Herman Cain would’ve divided the 12 tribes in sections of 9-9-9 and that just wouldn’t have worked at all.

I can picture Cain working in his kitchen rolling out some pizza dough, and then suddenly, “Ding” – “HERMAN RUN FOR PRESIDENT!”

Evidently the Pizza Man has decided he needs to play up his faith a little more while in the midst of battling multiple sexual harassment allegations, trying to shift the conversation to religion, and good old fashioned “family values” and away from groping.

In a speech to a national meeting of young Republicans, Cain said the Lord persuaded him after much prayer.

“That’s when I prayed and prayed and prayed. I’m a man of faith – I had to do a lot of praying for this one, more praying than I’ve ever done before in my life,” Cain said. “And when I finally realized that it was God saying that this is what I needed to do, I was like Moses. ‘You’ve got the wrong man, Lord. Are you sure?'”

And the second time in his life he’s prayed as hard was when all these women came forward to say he’d touched them and made unwanted sexual advances – I don’t remember that being a problem for Moses?

Cain isn’t the first to say God prodded him toward a campaign. The Reverend Rick Perry’s wife, Anita, has said she felt God was speaking to her about the race, adding that her husband needed to see a “burning bush,” a Biblical reference to God’s first appearance to Moses.

OK, now just wait a minute, God moves in mysterious ways not dumb ways; of all the people God could convince to run for President he chooses Cain and Perry, really? If nothing else the current crop of GOTP contenders definitely shows God has a sense of humor.

Leave a comment

Posted by on November 13, 2011 in 2012 Election


Tags: , , , , ,

Arab Spring has gotten out of hand?

Republican Tea Party (GOTP) incredible shrinking presidential candidate Herman “Pizza Man” Cain said during the most recent “debate” that President Barack Obama’s reaction to the Arab Spring, has allowed the movement to go in the wrong direction.

“You have to look at Libya, Egypt, Yemen and all of the revolutions that are going on and how the administration has mishandled them,” he said. “As a result, this has gotten totally out of hand.”

You can hear his brain captain screaming, “How dare these people decide their own destiny, don’t they know that the right way is to have America invade your country and force feed democracy to them?!”

Pizza Man claims the revolution in Egypt, where citizens ousted long-time President Hosni Mubarak, could strain relations between the United States and Egypt, and he warned against the increased power of opposition group the Muslim Brotherhood, which formed a political party earlier this year.

“Our relationship with Egypt may not survive,” he said. “It turned out that the opposition was more of the Muslim Brotherhood, which could end up with a majority of control of this new government.”

Here’s the FOX PAC conservative line, look out for the Muslim Brotherhood to take control in the vacuum in Egypt!

So, Cain would have supported a policy of pouring billions of dollars into a regime notorious for torturing and murdering its own people?

Cain also criticized the president for his support for protests in Yemen, where the Yemeni government has responded with violence to peaceful protests.

“This president has already said that the president of Yemen should go,” Cain said. “He is our friend. He has been helping us fight Al Qaeda. This president has been on the wrong side in nearly every situation in the Arab world.”

Now we know that Herman Cain subscribes to the uber-conservative Machiavellian theory that the “enemy of my enemy is my friend”. Earth to Herman, America can’t proclaim itself as the “bright shining city on the hill” while simultaneously supporting corrupt and murderous governments just because sometimes they’re our friend.

The old cold war policy of throwing billions of dollars at nations in bribes is out dated and has never served us well; problem with buying friendship is eventually some new kid comes along who pays more. Of course when your answer has always been to pay people off what more can we expect from the Pizza Man?

1 Comment

Posted by on November 13, 2011 in 2012 Election


Tags: , , , , , , ,